Swingers - Further Information
The following is some additional
terminology that you may come across in the swinging scene.
Scroll down the page or click the link below.
Urban Swingers,
Bisexuals,
Polyamory, Hot Wife,
Singles, Dogging,
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Swingers FAQ's
Urban Swingers
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The term ‘urban swingers’ was used to apply to a
form of swinging which took off in the late 1990’s with ‘Fever
Parties’. This ‘style’ of swinging generally is aimed at
affluent ‘urban’ young people where the upper age limit may be
around 40 and can sometime average as low as the late 20’s.
There are a number of clubs/organizations, which
are said to cater specifically for this type of swinging (Fever,
Club Liberty, Lounge Parties and Belle Baise) and hold events in
‘up market’ venues and ask guest to dress in evening attire.
These events have been successful and are no longer exclusively
‘urban’. It is said that that ‘younger couples’ use the term
‘The Lifestyle’ to encompass swinging activities as they are
uncomfortable with the traditional term ‘swingers’.
Bisexuals
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Female bisexuality is very common in the
swinging scene and considered 'normal' to participants.
Male bisexuality is less common in the
swinging scene, but is becoming more common and more accepted.
More openly bi men and bisexual couples (male-female couples
where both partners are bisexual) are appearing on the scene.
Whether this is due to increasing acceptance in the scene or
greater numbers of men "turning bi" is open to discussion.
Depending on the club or social situation, male bisexuality
among swingers may either be frowned upon, or openly accepted.
Generally, however, the open minded nature of the Lifestyle
community as a whole is conducive to acceptance of bisexual men
(though some choose not to engage in sexual activity with them
or with their partners.)
Clubs for gay or lesbian couples, where
available, operate quite separately from the broader swinging
community. The organised gay community attempts to be tolerant
of this to some degree, but also exhibits some characteristics
of biphobia. Namely, they are hesitant to accept more "fluid"
sexualities such as bisexuality, believing that it undermines
the category of homosexuality as a whole. The primary
difference, though, is that the Lifestyle has, at its heart, a
focus on sexual activity while the gay community is
centered around sexual identity.
Concordantly, a heterosexual male trying to
fulfill a fantasy of having two women would be out-of-place in
the lesbian community. Claiming to be "female seeks female"
where a "couple seeks female" categorization is more appropriate
may also draw negative reactions. Some groups for bisexual women
within the organised gay/lesbian community, such as [6],
therefore limit their membership to women only.
Polyamory
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Polyamory specifically refers to individuals
who sustain multiple emotional relationships with other
individuals. This allows for some overlap within the swinging
community. Polyamorists may engage in activity common to
swingers such as group sex and partner swapping. Swingers,
through extended sexual engagements with the same partners, may
also develop strong friendships with these partners. Deeper
emotional relationships, however, are not the norm and are
considered a rarity. Most swingers distinguish between the
multiple emotional relationships present in polyamory,
and the multiple sexual relationships present in
swinging.
Hot Wife
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The term hot wife refers to a married
woman who has sex with men other than her spouse with her
spouse's consent. In most cases the husbands of these women will
enjoy watching, hearing, or knowing about their wife's
adventures. Often the husbands take part, sometimes by engaging
in a threesome, or sometimes just arranging dates for their
wives. A distinct subculture of Hotwiving is Cuckolding. This
subculture is generally defined by a relationship in which the
husband enjoys the humiliation of his wife being sexually
satisfied by other men.
Singles
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The acceptance of singles at swinging events
varies from geographic area to geographic area. Some swinging 'clubs'
have a policy of allowing only couples and females, but most do
allow single men on selected nights. Single females are also
often admitted at reduced admission price. Parties and events
may differ, however, and are often restricted to couples or
couples and single females only.
The reasons for this vary. Most (but certainly
not all) of the people who pay to participate in swinger events
are male-female couples and most swinging couples are more
interested in interacting with other couples or with single
women than with single men. Thus, swinger events strive to
achieve a balance between male and female participants or have a
(usually slightly) larger number of females than males.
A common complaint among swingers is that
single men change the tone and nature of event. It should be
noted that while outright hostility towards single men is rarely
prevalent, an abundance of single males is rarely looked upon
favourably in any swinging context. When single males are
permitted their number are usually limited by high entrance fees
or stringent membership requirements.
Conversely, some oppose the involvement of any
singles of either sex in swinging due because of the fear that
they might split existing couples.
Dogging
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Dogging is a British term for swinging based
in cars that takes place in a public but reasonably secluded
area. There are several known dogging spots across the UK where
people go after dark, typically to engage in voyeurism and
exhibitionism but also to take part in group sex.
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